Christ Follower, Husband, Father, Writer
Psalms 37:4 is one of the most beloved and misinterpreted verses in scripture.
I know this about you, you read these words, “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires,” and you think, “Hot dog! God’s gonna gimme what I want.” All, I gotta do is “take delight in Him.” Easy peasy – where do I sign up?
That title might be a little deceptive because, the truth is, I believe we are exactly what we think.
The problem is, as Christ followers, we tend to think the wrong things.
As a follower of Jesus there may be no bigger truth than the one stated above – IF – the rest of verse is true.
In Genesis, scripture declares that God spoke the world into existence. 8 times in the first chapter a verse begins with the words, “and God said.”
It’s what he says or rather, what He does when it comes to man.
Maybe it has nothing to do with how I feel. Which is an odd way to think about life.
You like to think that you have yours and I have mine.
What’s right for you is not for me.
There’s no absolute, only shade from a different tree.
Sometimes we bend, others omit, You say there’s degrees;
but the reality is, you just refuse to see.
No ebb no flow, no shifting light. The final pronouncement
ends the night.
Your guilt shouted down, hidden by volume, pride defends the lies you swallow.
Your hate misdirected, aimed at the sky; unjustified rage, mental incarceration.
You’re being tortured by your own head.
It’s all just a lie. One that you believe.
The Truth is a gift – you just have to receive.
I cannot be the only one, can I?
I cannot possibly be the only person that is tired, mentally fatigued to the point where I simply do not care if I even get out of bed?
I cannot be the only one, can I?
Am I the single person on Earth that feels like his problems are not understood much less met with any kind of sympathy?
I am surrounded by people and yet I feel alone. I am alone. I am utterly alone. The solitude like a noose slowly tightened, drawing tighter, breathing shallow. My eyes refuse to focus, my limbs become rebellious; fighting to even stand.
I cannot be the only one, can I?
My closets friend has become my worst enemy and I am devastated at the prospect of the finality that looms. The hardest part is that I do not even seem to care. I am almost relieved at the thought that I may be done with that chapter. The hardest chapter I’ve ever written both in it’s production and destruction.
I cannot be the only one, can I?
And yet, I am not without hope. Yes, it’s dark outside, but there is light – distant perhaps – beyond the clouds. I have a sense that it will all work out though I may not ever know when. I do not have to always feel happy, right? I do not have to, do I?
I cannot be the only one, am I?
I wonder sometimes why exactly it is that I write. Why do I spend countless hours in front of the computer stringing words together?
Why do I sit up for hours after my family has gone to bed or rise hours before they wake to get thoughts and ideas down on paper – or more recently – into some digital format?
The following IS NOT me or my thoughts. Not that I have not felt some of them perhaps all of them from time to time. We all have. Only one person in history has gone through their life and not held a grudge, not felt bitterness, not forgiven. Even on the cross, Scripture tells us that when Jesus, “…was insulted, he did not insult in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten but entrusted himself to the one who judges justly” (1 Peter 2:23).
Home of the Writers Mastermind for Fiction Writers
BY GRACE THROUGH FAITH
On Writing, Ideas, and Making a Difference
Daily Thoughts and Meditations as we journey together with our Lord.
Mick Holt 