The following IS NOT me or my thoughts. Not that I have not felt some of them perhaps all of them from time to time. We all have. Only one person in history has gone through their life and not held a grudge, not felt bitterness, not forgiven. Even on the cross, Scripture tells us that when Jesus, “…was insulted, he did not insult in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten but entrusted himself to the one who judges justly” (1 Peter 2:23).
Have you noticed that there is no shortage of people wanting to give you advice about how to make your blog the next big thing (NBT)? Seems like everyone knows “the secret” and for a price, they’ll share it with you. Speed up, slow down, do more, do less, procrastinate, multi-task, don’t multi-task, give things away, don’t give anything away, guest post for everyone, comment on blogs, only comment on your blog – AAAAGGGHHH!!!
It is enough to make you crazy – this world of blogging.
It’s funny how something that happened more than six years ago can be mentioned and bring to mind a flood of raw emotion that I really thought I had dealt with. Turns out I did nothing more than bury the feelings so deep because I was not equipped to deal with them then.
I am not 100% sure I am right now, either.
The anger, frustration and sadness, I felt in 2007 was at times overwhelming. The complete futility I felt at the news of my cousin’s death was only compounded a couple months later when I learned of the death of a high school friend.
After last night’s NFC Championship game between the Seattle Seahawks and the San Francisco 49ers– a really good game I thought – an outburst by a member of the Seattle squad, Richard Sherman, really ruined the moment for the Seahawks and started – at least one – Face Book debate about Sherman’s behavior and it was made to be about race almost immediately.
For the record – and I said this on FB last night – I don’t care that he exclaimed that he was the best corner back in the league. I think you MUST think that about yourself to make it – in the NFL and life. If you question your skills, ability or value than others will too and that could easily come back to haunt you.
Quiet pandering to a hollow soul seeking to kill all it sees – crying.
Searching for light. Longing for the engagement of another – lost below the waves of anxiety.
How do you know the heart in me; when I hardly know it myself?
How do you love me so completely, when I cannot let go?
How do you know just what to say when I’m about to cry?
How do you know what the answer is and I do not know why?