Posts Tagged ‘grace’

nanowrimo_2016_webbanner_participantThis weekend I failed. That’s the bad news.

The good news is that it was only my first weekend attempting NaNoWrimo (National Novel Writing Month) and I really only failed for the weekend. (more…)

My #dontbreakthechain calendar as it looked on 10 JUNE 214

My #dontbreakthechain calendar as it looked on 10 JUNE 214

**Editors Note**

I wrote this back in June so some of the numbers and dates are old but the sentiment is the same. I took me this long to pull the trigger on posting this because I had grown so comfortable with the My 500 crew and was hesitent – to say the least – about making any changes.

God Bless you All

MickHolt (more…)

**NOTE** Not only is today National Star Wars day – May the Fourth be with you – it is also the one year anniversary of mickholt.com. I have learned a lot over the last year but still struggle with some questions – as you’ll read below. Thank you, to everyone that reads PADAG regularly, has read in the past or will be reading this for the first time – I hope you find something of value here and if so, I would love if you joined in – or started – the conversation below. Be blessed and I look forward to building this community.

Y’all keep the acorn spinnin’

#dontbreakthechain

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Ecclesiastes 3: 1- 8 (KJV)

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

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empty-tombI wonder sometimes why exactly it is that I write. Why do I spend countless hours in front of the computer stringing words together?

Why do I sit up for hours after my family has gone to bed or rise hours before they wake to get thoughts and ideas down on paper – or more recently – into some digital format?

Why do I bother putting sentences or paragraphs on a blog that only a handful of people read – and fewer respond to? Or into a book that, if finished, there is no guarantee that it will get published or – like the blog – read.

Why I do aI imagine that anyone cares or that anyone is affected by the time I spend doing what I do? It is not as though I am the only one writing down words, the only one posting on blogs, the only one pouring my heart into something that does not get heard on the radio, broadcasted on television or projected in a theater.

So why? Why do I write? Why do I? Why write?

The answer – for me – does not come from the rhetorical, “Why not”? It does not even come from the imperative “I must” or, the seemingly positive but equally negative, “I can’t not write”.

Which is what a real writer is supposed to say, right? Well, then, I guess I am not a “real” writer because none of those – some may be valid for you – pertain to me.

For me it not matter of what I can or cannot do. It is not about what my skills and abilities happen to be – in short – it is not about me.

For me, it all comes down to what I get to do. What I am allowed to do. What I have been blessed with the ability to do. And to some degree what I have been asked to do.

But mostly, what I choose to do.

See, I have spent many years “looking” for what I am supposed to do. I have been under the delusion that this is some mystical process or super spiritual moment where God pulls you aside and says something like “OK, kid, this it. This is your time. HERE is my calling for you. Follow this plan to the title and you’ll be IN my will”

Only, I don’t see that happening. I don’t think it works that way. Not for me or you.

Do I believe that God has a plan for our lives? Yes, the bible says God has a will for our lives but I don’t think that if you skip college you’re going to miss out. I don’t think if you join the military you’re going to miss out. I don’t even think you’ll ever come to a point where you zigged when you should have zagged and then miss out.

Could you have made a better choice? Of course, see the life of King David. You know, the man after God’s own heart who had an affair, had a man killed and then tried to cover it up. The man that was still the Great Grandfather (insert several greats) of Jesus?

No, for me I get to write because Jesus didn’t stay in the grave.

What other reason do I need? What other reason do you need?

Whatever your profession is or will be – you’re called to “…love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, body, soul and spirit…and love your neighbor as yourself…”

Jesus said these were the most important commandments. Notice what he didn’t say?

“Go, be doctor, lawyer, preacher, teacher, hamburger flipper.”

Love God, love your neighbor.

That’s why I write because I LOVE GOD! No other reason. It does not matter what I write, how I write, when or where – I don’t believe God cares.

He wants me to love him and he wants me to love YOU. See how I changed “neighbor” to “you”?

Clever huh?

On this day that we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ, who demonstrated his power over death I wonder how you will answer the question…

“Why do you………..?
 Wanna leave a comment? I would love to know what you do.
Photo from Noli Noli

Photo from Noli Noli

God has spoken to me in the past – not audibly but I could hear him in my heart. I have talked and written about that in the past.

The first time he told me that I had built a wall around my heart and I was not allowing him to enter – then he told me how to change that. I walked out of church that morning drove home and did what I was told.

The next time was a year or so later and I was struggling to find my lace in his will – or as I like to say , finding His will for my life. The thing is though, that I was not doing anything. Rather, I was spinning my wheels doing nothing waiting, as I have said for God to speak to me through a burning bush or a billboard or – and I really looked for these too – scripture references in license plates. I wish I was making that up.

You know because God always hides messages out in the open for you to see if you really want to find them, right?

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Breast Cancer RibbonI was sitting on the floor going through a box of old comic books; wrapped up in a story lines of mutants falling in love, fighting and just being cool. I was enraptured by the lines and shadows in the corners, the details on the faces of some of my all time favorite heroes. The depth of emotions that are conveyed in nothing more than a cartoon. Only that’s not right is it? They’re not just cartoons are they? They’re an art form, epic, masterful, enduring.

For a few minutes I was a kid again. Nothing in my life more important than finishing this comic and moving on to see what was happening in another part of the universe. For a few minutes.

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Am I?

Posted: March 24, 2014 in God's Will, Poetry
Tags: , , , ,

What is your direction?Am I angry?

Am I jealous?

Am I stupid?

Am I dense?

Am I afraid?

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Cancer Sucks

Posted: March 12, 2014 in God's Will
Tags: , , , , ,

Breast Cancer RibbonCancer sucks.

No, I have never had it but I can tell you it sucks. I have watched if fought from the sidelines. I have been a part of the support system, oh, I am in the cast but I have never had the lead and I would be lying if I said I wanted the starring role. But it has lived in my house so I feel well equipped to write on this topic.

So, I can say without reservation that having cancer sucks – for everyone involved.

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ApuffyshirtisjustnotlogicalHow much time do you spend beating yourself up for things you wish you had done? Or things you wished you’d done differently? Or things you’d wished you’d never done? Or, or, or…

That guy you dated for WAY too long, the girl you dumped WAY too soon, a class you wanted to take, a movie you wanted to see maybe you zigged when you should have zagged? I bet you have your own that you’re already thinking about.

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What is your direction?I have not been very focused on PADAG recently. It is not that my interest in helping people find their way to God’s will has waned but to be perfectly honest, I have been so attuned to my own purpose that writing for this space has taken a back seat. This blog and all of you are on my mind all the time but my attention has been on other kinds of writing.

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