I remember driving down the street to the first house we lived in when we moved here. It had been maybe 6 years since I had seen the house or really driven anywhere near it but in that moment I needed to connect with a part of my past. It had been far too long. It was a long drive but it was worth it. You could call this an attempt to get at something familiar before I embarked on what I believed would be the biggest change in my life and to that point – it was. However, I thought it would be the door to open up the whole world to me; a passage to another dimension – well, not literally but going from nearly not graduating high school to leaving for Parris Island in less than forty eight hours – I think another dimension really captures the heart of what I was feeling.
No, I have never had it but I can tell you it sucks. I have watched if fought from the sidelines. I have been a part of the support system, oh, I am in the cast but I have never had the lead and I would be lying if I said I wanted the starring role. But it has lived in my house so I feel well equipped to write on this topic.
So, I can say without reservation that having cancer sucks – for everyone involved.
***NOTE*** The following is somethign I wrote to go with a post I am doing titled “Why Are You So Mad – The Face of Intolerance.” Which is a response to a blog post I read this week which illustrates the frustration I have being called intolerant for my beilefs. For some of my other thoughts on the question of intolerance I invite you to read this post.
So, last night – last week by the time this publishes – I wrote about two deaths, my cousin who was about a year older than I am and my friend Mike Dorman – from high school. Well, really I knew Dorman in eighth grade but whose keeping track? I thought specifically about the memorial service we had for Dorman here in Tampa.
More on that in a bit.
Through some of the comments I received I stated to think about the impact we have on the lives of people around us and most of us will never know that impact this side of Heaven.
And maybe that’s a good thing.
It’s funny how something that happened more than six years ago can be mentioned and bring to mind a flood of raw emotion that I really thought I had dealt with. Turns out I did nothing more than bury the feelings so deep because I was not equipped to deal with them then.
I am not 100% sure I am right now, either.
The anger, frustration and sadness, I felt in 2007 was at times overwhelming. The complete futility I felt at the news of my cousin’s death was only compounded a couple months later when I learned of the death of a high school friend.
I mean really? For me, not often. Not often enough.
Today I reached the end of a 31 day writing challenge and honestly, thinking back to the first of January, I didn’t think I’d complete this one.
The challenge was to write at least 500 words a day for the month. Those were the rules. I didn’t have to write a book, blog post, poem, letter or anything that even made sense – I had several of those nights – the idea was just to get into the habit of writing.
I did it.
Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus (Phil 3:13-14 KJV).
I am working through a month long challenge wherein nearly 1700 people have committed to writing at least 500 words a day. Every day we’re given a writing prompt; some use it some do not – it is not part of the challenge to write what we’re told to write just that we write.
“23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, 24 since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving (NIV).”
How many times have you read that verse and applied it to your J-O-B?
1? 10? 50? 100?
If you’re like me, you’ve probably done it more times than you care to remember. And the truth is, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that application.