The last couple weeks, I have been going through an old writing folder I came across and it’s weird to me some of the things I was writing this part of the year – 10 FULL years ago.
The scary part is, that unfortunately for me, MANY of the themes and sentences are the EXACT same as I have been saying to myself recently – despite my attempts at changing the way I think/speak.
That is a much bigger project than one might believe but it is one that I will not quit.
It is too important and too long over due.
There are so many layers to our thought lives that many of the “lies” we tell ourselves are so ingrained we think of them as the truth.
Which, it’s my belief, is the plan of the Enemy of all Christ followers.
Satan knows he’s lost our souls, but if he can keep us from being effective witnesses for God, then he can keep us from being prosperous and if he can keep us stuck in a negativity cyclone, then, while he doesn’t win, he at least put some points on the board.
The following is a line from a free write I did back on this date (30APRIL2014) ….
“So, why am I not doing it? That’s the question
Why?
I don’t have a good answer. I have an answer. I am a “quitter loser” and I don’t follow through with anything – no matter how good I am. Bad answer but it is the truth.”
The “it” in that sentence is comedy…still asking myself why I am not doing that, but I’ll leave that pondering for another post…
It’s true that it’s a “bad answer” but it doesn’t have to be. That entire last sentience is a self-fulfilling prophecy that I am now in process of changing.
For too long I said things like that to myself – no wonder I have lived such an unsatisfactory life.
I think it is safe to say I hated myself…if I didn’t why would I talk to myself that way?
Why would you?
But for some reason, it is often “open season” on ourselves.
I believe it has to do with the fact that we do not see ourselves as worthy of being loved or receiving love, we don’t deserve to be happy or successful and we spend our adult lives beating ourselves up based on the lies we were told as children.
One of my “unaware mentors” calls it our “liedentity.” Because someone we love or respected once told us something about us and we adopted it as truth and have repeated it to ourselves ever since.
In my case, one in particular, for nearly 40 years.
The problem is, these lies do not line up with God’s word or his descriptions of who and what we are.
We think we know better because once our father told us to “not bother” trying something because we didn’t pick it up as quickly as he claims he did.
Hope that wasn’t too real for you…
Or do I?
But this is about shattering the “liedentity” and embracing who we actually are.
Who God made us to be.
See, God’s word says, we are “complete” in Christ (Col. 2:10).
Complete means “finished.”
Have you ever put together a puzzle and then once the last piece is in place, thought to yourself that you had more to do?
NO! Because the puzzle is complete, you’re done, it’s finished.
The same is true of us.
Another verse says “we’re MORE than conquerors” (Emphasis mine) (Rom. 8:37).
Imagine having the higher score at the end of a game and the ref’s saying, “No, you still need more points to win.”
It’s not like that with us. We are ‘MORE THAN”
Until we start believing that truth – and the dozens of others found in scripture – we’ll continue to live these “less than” lives.
All because we place more value to the faulty word of another human instead of the ultimate Creator.
Let’s change the way we talk to ourselves and it might just lead to a change in the way talk to each other.
Mick Holt 
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