We see all the things they do and make most of our life decisions based on what we see. We’re either motivated to do or not do what we’ve witnessed.
Like you, I saw things and made choices that have moved me through life to the point where I question everything, including my value as a person.
Too often, I missed the forest for the trees. I saw what was going on and fell into the same traps, went down the same roads, made the same mistakes. I failed in places I never thought I would. I put up walls and set up defenses that I thought would keep me from living my life the way I had seen it play out for others.
I was so intent on not getting stuck in a life that I would ultimately hate that I said things like “well, I don’t want to get pigeon holed so I am not going to make a choice.” “I want to keep my options open.”
Stupid, ignorant, uninformed misguided, pointless and ungrateful are all words that can – and should – be used to describe the way I lived for many years.
Did I say stupid? I meant STOOOOOOOOPID!
I still do it today. I sit and wait for the perfect job, the right moment to speak out. The perfect topic to write about. I hide the fact that I write for fear that people might read my words and disagree or worse – actually agree with me. Validating me and my ideas.
I look for the billboard with God’s instructions for my life. I look for shapes in the clouds, messages on bumper stickers and hidden meanings in licenses plates.
I need to stop doing that and I suspect you do too. You wanna know something…the billboards ain’t coming and the skies are not going to be filled with cloud shaped arrows telling you where to go or what to do.
God may have done that in the past but it is not how he operates today. No burning buses, no stone tablets, no manna, no seas split in two so you and I can pass on dry land.
Oh, I believe He still tells us what to do but not in those ways. He’s much more subtle.
He gives us the freedom to make the choices that lead to mistakes that may seem to take us off the path He wants for us. When, it might just be that what you perceive as a mistake is the very thing God intended to happen to you in first place. To teach you, teach me the lesson we need to learn in order to better serve him the way He intends – not the way we think we should.
We just cannot see it because we’re not – news flash – Him.
Spend some time reading His word – the Bible. Find some people that also believe and read His word – do I mean find a church? Maybe, but the people are what matter not the location where they meet. And talk to God. You might have heard that called prayer – but I hate jargon.
So, just talk to God like you would a friend – he’ll hear you. Right where you are. With all your baggage, doubts and even your sin.
Please do not misunderstand. I am not saying that if you do these things your life and path will become crystal clear. That you won’t have any more trouble or problems. In all likelihood, this will only increase the difficulties in your life because He wants to know how much you trust him.
It’s not an easy ride or even safe trip but you know what…in the end it will be worth it when you look full in the face of Jesus and he smiles.