Peter’s Lament

Posted: March 7, 2013 in Poetry

**Peter has long been my favorite apostle. I feel that I most closely relate with him. He was brash and impulsive at times ready to storm the gates of Hell for Jesus – then there’s the denial. The life, mistakes and redemption of Peter is a lesson to us all about how God can use you – and me – despite our mistakes – not matter how many or often we make them.

The following is what I imagine was going through Peter’s head on the day of Christ’s crucifixion. 

As always please let me know what you think of Peter, your life as it relates or the piece itself.


Hours spent in silent torment; Devils roam the earth.

 
Denied three times, could that one be me? 
 
What will my pain be worth?
 
The sky is getting darker my heart is full of fear. 
 
What have I done? Where will I run? 
 
The Savior’s time is here.
 
Why does he just hang there? Why does he not exalt
Himself above mankind, is he not the Holy One?
 
Am I just like these animals? Do I want him dead?
 
Ugly, cruel and dirty. Screams inside my head.
 
“Upon this rock,” a curse to me. The words cut like a knife.
Another minute and we’ll see His glory. Another minute.
 
Why won’t he just come down?
 
How could I be so…? 
 
I won’t believe, I can’t believe. 
 
Why won’t he just come down? 
 
What is he doing? I can’t understand. This is not how its supposed to be. 
 
I despise the things I’ve done today. None of this makes sense.
 
What if he can’t? Maybe he can’t.  What if all this…
Was it just a lie?
 
Please let me know what you think?
Comments
  1. TC Avey says:

    I identify with Peter too. Sometimes I'm bold and ready to GO, other times I'm scared.I think Peter probably did have some of these thoughts going through his mind as Christ hung on the cross. So often we think the people in the Bible were super hero's of faith- but they were real people!

  2. Mickholt says:

    You're right, we do not see them as people. I think that has to do with the fact that we've always known them as characters in a book. Similar to the way we look at most people from history. We're so far removed from them that we have a hard time relating to them as actual people.

  3. I've often wondered exactly what was going through the minds of the disciples. I imagine it was a total roller coaster ride. I've always thought that a part of it also was that Peter WASN'T thinking when he denied Christ. It was emotional and spiritual weakness that lashed out in the moment.

  4. Mickholt says:

    I know how I have reacted to Jesus not doing what I want – they must have been so far out of their minds. I can only imagine. Because it was not until after the resurrection that they understood – you know?Thanks for commenting!

  5. Jeremy Myers says:

    Wow. What a perfect post for this Easter season. I really like how you put yourself in Peter's shoes on this. I imagine this is exactly what he was thinking.

  6. mickholt says:

    Thank you, so much. It actually started out from Christ's perspective but the more I wrote the more sense Peter made.Thanks for commenting.

  7. […] Peter’s Lament – What might have been going through Peter’s mind on the day Christ died […]

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